26 September 2007

The Bishop!



Devious: Now then, vic. What's the trouble?
Vicar: It's about this letter you sent me regarding my insurance claim.
Devious: Oh, yeah, yeah - well, you see, it's just that we're not...as yet...totally satisfied with the grounds of your claim.
Vicar: But it says something about filling my mouth in with cement.
Devious: Oh well, that's just insurance jargon, you know.
Vicar: But my car was hit by a lorry while standing in the garage and you refuse to pay my claim.
Devious: (rising and crossing to a filing cabinet) Oh well, reverend Morrison...in your policy...in your policy...(he open the drawer of the filing cabinet and takes out a shabby old sports jacket; he feels in the pocket and pulls out a crumbled dog-eared piece of paper then puts the coat back and shuts the filing cabinet)...here we are. It states quite clearly that no claim you make will be paid.
Vicar: Oh dear.
Devious: You see, you unfortunately plumped for our 'Neverpay' policy, which, you know, if you never claim is very worthwhile...but you had to claim, and, well, there it is.
Vicar: Oh dear, oh dear.
Devious: Still, never mind - could be worse. How's the nude lady?
Vicar: Oh, she's fine. (he begins to sob)
Devious: Look...Rev...I hate to see a man cry, so shove off out the office, there's a good chap.

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